One Book to the Next

Like any good book, you rush and rush to get to the end to find out what it's finally all about only to find yourself not have wanting it to end. I've rushed my Roanoke/Blacksburg book with application after application only to find myself a job, which will require me to relocate. I've stopped myself from finishing it and slowing down because I forgot that the second to the last chapter: the goodbyes.

It didn't hit me until last night when I was thinking about what to wear and bring for Field Day with my third graders today. Do I wear a t-shirt or a thin, but styled shirt? Do I wear blue or khaki Bermuda shorts? Do I put on sunscreen or not? Do I get myself coffee or make it before I go to school? Just stupid, insignificant questions that distracted me from the big picture. As I sat down to write a silly status on Facebook about it, it hit me and it hit hard. Not only was it my last day with these students that have made my student teaching career so enjoyable and fun, but the school and community that has supported and pushed me to be the teacher I am now. It would be naive of me to say that this school is the model for the perfect community that I look for because it's the only school that I've worked at, but it truly did feel like home.

As a teacher, they reach many lives, whether is significantly or only for a minute. I hope that I've been an impact on the students even though I was only a student teacher and substitute teacher. I know I did with my third graders. One parent told me that her son decided to come to school on Memorial Day for Field day because I was going to be substituting in his class. This student had a choice of not coming to school and I was the deciding factor! I'm overwhelmed by the thought that a student came to school because of me. Granted, the was not even a minute of instructional time today, but still I'm humbled.

You're probably thinking that's the opposite of what I should be saying, but I am. It's the realization that I am doing something right, but truly, I chose the right career path- I listened to Him. I'm also in one (if not) the most rewarding careers with the least pay. That is humbling.

If I was able to get one child to come to school while I making an impact as a student teacher, then it's time to move forward and (hopefully) make even more positive impacts on my own classroom of students. My time at this school cannot be written in a chapter neither can my time at Radford, Roanoke, or Blacksburg. Therefore, I'm finishing up this book over the summer with goodbyes and thanks to the ones that have impacted my life just as much if not even more.

"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."- Dr. Suess

For Really

I actually want to buy a movie. This desire has never occurred before.

Be Satisfied with Me

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone,

To have a deep soul relationship with another,

To be loved thoroughly and exclusively.

But God, to a Christian, says,

"No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and content

With being loved by Me alone,

With giving yourself totally and unreservedly to Me,

With having an intensely personal and unique relationship

With Me alone.

Discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found,

Will you be capable of the perfect human relationship

That I have planned for you.

You will never be united with another until you are united

With Me alone,

Exclusive of anyone or anything else,

Exclusive of any other desires or longings.

I want you to stop planning,

Stop wishing,

And allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing,

One that you cannot imagine.

Please allow Me to bring it to you.

You just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things.

Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I Am.

Keep listening and learning the things I tell you.

You just wait.

That's all.

Don't be anxious.

Don't worry.

Don't look at the things you think you want;

You just keep looking off and away up to Me,

Or you'll miss what I want to show you.

And then when you are ready,

I'll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than any

You could dream of.

You see, until you are ready and until

The one I have for you is ready

(I am working even at this moment to have you both ready at the same time),

Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me

And the life I prepared for you,

You won't be able to experience the love that

Exemplified your relationship with Me.

And this is the perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love,

I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your

Relationship with Me,

And to enjoy materially and concretely

The everlasting union of beauty, perfection and love

That I offer you with Myself.

Know that I love utterly.

I Am God.

Believe it and be satisfied.

~ St. Anthony of Padua

The End

What I've given has not been wasted despite the reciprocity, therefore making my time and effort worth and mean something. I don't know what that something is...

Maybe that is why it's call, "The End."

Humble Me

"You humble me Lord
Humble me Lord
I'm on my knees empty
You humble me Lord
You humble me Lord
Please, please, please forgive me"

Check List

[x] Get Brian home
[x] Walk across graduation stage
[x] Receive teaching license (VA & NC)
[x] Find a classroom
[ ] Get master's degree
[ ] Get a dog
[ ] Get doctorate's degree

Almost half of them are checked off within 6 months of graduating- not too shabby!

God is Hil-freaking-arious

In October, do not ask me which blog, I had baked cute little ghost pumpkin breads and blogged about it. The caption underneath said, "If teaching doesn't work out, I'll be a baker." Ironically, I recently got hired at a bakery because I can't seems to find a teaching job. Although I was not hired as a baker, I think it is close enough.

Thanks, God. I have always known that you had a sense of humor. Oh, and thanks for landing me a job that offers free coffee, pastries, and French cuisine!